Daughter Difficulty

Today started out with Riley crying out at a few minutes before 6 this morning complaining of tummy pain. I scooped her up and snuggled her between Jamey and I since it was almost time to get up anyway. She kind of dozed off for a few minutes but when I got up to take a shower she started complaining again.

I made her get up to try to potty and after she peed she threw up and SCREAMING with pain so I thought...okay she is really sick. (You have to understand she complains about her tummy hurting quite a bit but it usually subsides after she pees, poops or eats.)

I told her that if she was sick she could stay out of school but she had to go to the doctor because missing school is a BIG deal.

I called my MIL and told her what was going on and that I was bringing Sam to her while I took Riley to the doctor.

When we pulled up to MIL's house Riley magically felt better but I decided that school had already started that I would call the doctor anyway and take her to the doctor to address the almost daily tummy aches and a few other things.

I left her with my MIL so that I could run to work for a few hours because we could not get in to see the doctor until 2:45 and I was out the whole day yesterday with Sam being sick. My concerns were ones that I wanted to discuss with Dr. Ryan instead of the wonderful nurse practitioners that work for him. I love them but I really wanted to see the doc today.

Riley felt fine for the remainder of the day so I made a list of concerns that I have about her. Let me list them:

SHE DOES NOT EAT
She literally throws up when she smells something bad.
She has not gained any weight since this time last year.
Her tummy hurts almost every day.
She "holds" her pee...I almost have to force her to pee every morning.
She is very irritable most of the time...um...maybe because she does not eat.
She is a very stubborn child and the eating issues maybe her way of trying to take control.
Did I say SHE DOES NOT EAT?

So I really love this doctor and he and I had a very candid talk after the physical exam about her and what his suggestions are. She was present during the conversation and she listened quite intently to what he had to say about her behavior.

He initiated the conversation about her general behavior and I explained to him that she is very headstrong and basically sees herself as our peer instead of our child. He said that was very common among first born children. I told him that I always give her reasons why. Why I tell her no, why she can't have what she wants, etc. and he basically told me to stop, not to give her the power to negotiate and to take away most of the choices. All of that makes perfect sense to me really....my mom didn't "negotiate" with me when I was 5!!!!! She could shoot me one look and I would HUSH!!!! I think to this day if she looked at me that way I would shut my mouth.

So....no more special meals just for Riley and no more BEGGING her to eat her food. She eats the same thing as everyone else or she does without until the next meal. He suggested that she only be given milk and water to drink. No more juice because as little as she eats that is probably contributing to her not eating. What little bit of appetite she has is being satisfied by the juice.

It is going to be hard to send her to bed at night if she did not eat her dinner but after a few days I bet she will be hungry enough to eat the dinner that she is currently turning her nose up at. I hope!

I told him that I didn't want to over or underplay her issues but that I really didn't know what I should try next.

I promise you that her eating or lack thereof is in the front of my mind and near the top of my worry list almost every single day....3 times each day! Very frustrating!!!!!!

I think she would be a much more pleasant child if she would eat, thus feel better every day.

Fingers are crossed that we can turn over a new leaf regarding this very frustrating and worrisome issue.

My Times Have Changed.....

With Riley in kindergarten and Sam in preschool things feel so different now days. Not bad....just different. In a way this new stage feels pretty good but in another way I don't really like it at all. I think it all boils down to the fact that I don't have a "baby" anymore. I know for certain that we do not want nor can we have any more babies but still it feels strange that my babies are growing up.

Riley being in "real" school and Sam beginning preschool and being such a trooper about it to boot really made me realize that they are getting bigger and more independent by the day. Watching them grow up fills my heart with such joy but in a weird way it also causes my heart sorrow.

First Day of Kindergarten

Well...tomorrow is Riley's big day....her first day of kindergarten. I am a all to pieces over this fact for some reason! I cannot really explain how I am feeling. I feel excited and sick at the same time. I am in awe at how quickly 5 years have passed an now she is not an infant, baby, toddler or preschooler any more. Yep, I feel sick. I know she will be fine...and I think I will be fine but for now I am a mess. I have not cried and I hope I do not cry tomorrow because it will probably alarm her...I hope I can at least hold back the waterworks until I am out of her sight. I just hope and pray that she has a happy and successful school year. She is so tender hearted and shy sometimes.

I remember my first day of kindergarten like it were yesterday! I remember walking down the long hallway with very shiny floors, walking into Miss Hambrick's room for the first time, having my cousin Laura show me around the room and that the girl's bathroom was marked with Minnie Mouse and the boy's was Mickey Mouse while my mom spoke to Miss Hambrick. I remember my mom leaving and I remember crying quietly but not making a big scene. I remember every detail, the toys, the decorations, the "reading house" where you could go to for quiet time with a book, I remember it all. I love it there and I loved the wonderful eccentric teacher with coke bottle thick glasses, hippie brown hair and who sang to us accompanied by her acoustic guitar every day. I still think of her when I hear..."she'll be coming round the mountain", or "this old man". :-)

Back to my first day....I was feeling pretty pitiful so after a little while I got tired of being sad and I wanted to laugh so I did something that made me laugh. When a little boy was about to sit down I pulled the chair out from under him and he hit the floor. Luckily it did not hurt him but when he fell it made a very funny "pop" sound and his eyes got really big. It was hysterical to me then and probably would still be today. He laughed and I laughed and I felt better. (Now you may be thinking...man that was mean but you have to understand one of my two older brothers was a CLOWN and he always cheered me up or kept me from taddling on him by making me laugh and we played jokes on each other like that all the time so in my little 5 year old brain pulling the chair out from under Luther was okay...I still see Luther all the time by the way he works at Walmart and when I see him I smile to myself to this day.)

Kindergarten was also when I met my very first "best friend" besides Laura who was more like a sister. I still remember Misty. We were inseparable. We were both shy and giggly and got along famously. She was the best!!!

After kindergarten the school district rezoned and I was moved to another school. That was traumatic for me and I missed Misty so much! I did not know anyone in 1st grade and I pretty much hated it for a while but I eventually made new friends and was accepted by those who already had their little clicks. (Funny how that happens SO young.) It is kind of strange/neat how when you move up you tend to stick with the people you know from elementary, to middle to high school. I can still tell you pretty much who all my friends were from WAY back when!

Ahhh....it was nice to go down memory lane for a minute. I think I will tell Riley about my first day in Kindergarten before bed tonight....leaving out the part about the stunt I pulled of course. :-)

Later Gaters!

Unorganized Juimble

My brain a big blob of organization right now and it is spilling over into other areas of my life.

I would love someone to do a study on me. I am sure they would find a lot of interesting information regarding how mental fog and static effects the rest of ones life.

My brain is a mess...I have so many thoughts and plan floating around and I am only able to grasp them occasionally before they dance away again, my car is a disaster but I can't seem to make myself clean it out, my house is completely unorganized and nothing seems to ever be in it's place, and even my purse is a mess with various items spilling out each time it gets tipped over. GRRRRRRRRRR!

To this moment I have not purchased a single school supply for my children and Riley starts school on MONDAY!!!! I guess my evening after the kids go to bed will be sitting down with pen and paper to make a list...which I may not be able to focus on making or that I will make and either forget where I put it or fail to follow through with handling the things listed on said list!

The only excuse I have is that work issues consume my brain power and when it is time to focus on other things I am already spent! Very frustrating and irritating!

I have got to pull things together....like yesterday! I get so mad at myself when I get this way!!!!

Later Gaters!