Daughter Difficulty

Today started out with Riley crying out at a few minutes before 6 this morning complaining of tummy pain. I scooped her up and snuggled her between Jamey and I since it was almost time to get up anyway. She kind of dozed off for a few minutes but when I got up to take a shower she started complaining again.

I made her get up to try to potty and after she peed she threw up and SCREAMING with pain so I thought...okay she is really sick. (You have to understand she complains about her tummy hurting quite a bit but it usually subsides after she pees, poops or eats.)

I told her that if she was sick she could stay out of school but she had to go to the doctor because missing school is a BIG deal.

I called my MIL and told her what was going on and that I was bringing Sam to her while I took Riley to the doctor.

When we pulled up to MIL's house Riley magically felt better but I decided that school had already started that I would call the doctor anyway and take her to the doctor to address the almost daily tummy aches and a few other things.

I left her with my MIL so that I could run to work for a few hours because we could not get in to see the doctor until 2:45 and I was out the whole day yesterday with Sam being sick. My concerns were ones that I wanted to discuss with Dr. Ryan instead of the wonderful nurse practitioners that work for him. I love them but I really wanted to see the doc today.

Riley felt fine for the remainder of the day so I made a list of concerns that I have about her. Let me list them:

SHE DOES NOT EAT
She literally throws up when she smells something bad.
She has not gained any weight since this time last year.
Her tummy hurts almost every day.
She "holds" her pee...I almost have to force her to pee every morning.
She is very irritable most of the time...um...maybe because she does not eat.
She is a very stubborn child and the eating issues maybe her way of trying to take control.
Did I say SHE DOES NOT EAT?

So I really love this doctor and he and I had a very candid talk after the physical exam about her and what his suggestions are. She was present during the conversation and she listened quite intently to what he had to say about her behavior.

He initiated the conversation about her general behavior and I explained to him that she is very headstrong and basically sees herself as our peer instead of our child. He said that was very common among first born children. I told him that I always give her reasons why. Why I tell her no, why she can't have what she wants, etc. and he basically told me to stop, not to give her the power to negotiate and to take away most of the choices. All of that makes perfect sense to me really....my mom didn't "negotiate" with me when I was 5!!!!! She could shoot me one look and I would HUSH!!!! I think to this day if she looked at me that way I would shut my mouth.

So....no more special meals just for Riley and no more BEGGING her to eat her food. She eats the same thing as everyone else or she does without until the next meal. He suggested that she only be given milk and water to drink. No more juice because as little as she eats that is probably contributing to her not eating. What little bit of appetite she has is being satisfied by the juice.

It is going to be hard to send her to bed at night if she did not eat her dinner but after a few days I bet she will be hungry enough to eat the dinner that she is currently turning her nose up at. I hope!

I told him that I didn't want to over or underplay her issues but that I really didn't know what I should try next.

I promise you that her eating or lack thereof is in the front of my mind and near the top of my worry list almost every single day....3 times each day! Very frustrating!!!!!!

I think she would be a much more pleasant child if she would eat, thus feel better every day.

Fingers are crossed that we can turn over a new leaf regarding this very frustrating and worrisome issue.